Sure , “ dancing madcap and diabolical Lesbian ” sounds exciting , but if you ’ve beenwatching NBC ’s Dracula , you know thatthis is a pretty chill Friday dark for the titular vampire .
So Van Helsing has got his “ get Dracula persist in the sun”machine working pretty well — so well , in fact , that Dracula declares he ’s notgoing to drink people ’s blood any longer . Van Helsing points out this is ahorrible idea , but Dracula is driven to be human , to get the better of the curse theOrder of the Dragon place on him . Most of all , he need to advert out with Minain the park and take a walk in the Sunday , where she complains about how listlessall the lunatics in her Fatherhood ’s insane sanctuary are . Grayson suggests she hold adance to liven their spirits . Mina loves the idea , and require to borrow Grayson’sphonograph for the social occasion . Of naturally he tell yes , and starts devising a wayto deform this into building sexual good will .
Harker , on the other hand , is n’t faring so well withGrayson . After learning the bookkeeper who told him Captain Shaw was a warprofiteer was a mere actress , Harker announces his mistake to Grayson and wantsto desex it . Grayson declines , and Harker pieces together that Grayson was behindthe plot — but it can never be proven . Harker is less than proud of , but isstill willing to station out invite to the Grayson Geomagnetic Electricityshindig that evening , where Grayson will debut ( for the 2nd time , I guess?)his magic spare electrical energy generator .
Meanwhile , Lucy is heartbroken about Mina rebuffing hergirl - on - girl activity advances , and Lady Jane consoles her . Mina is the bitch for turning her down and not being a lesbian , Lady Jane says , and the distraught Lucy accepts this fragile system of logic . Jane tellsher to slip Harker aside from Mina to hurt her like she hurt Lucy , which , certain . Later , Lucy helps Harker get his causa for the nuptials , and take on the oneroustask of measuring Harker ’s inseam with care and presumptively a littleball - cupping .
Also meanwhile , Dracula / Grayson sends Xaro Xhaon Renfield toBudapest to buy the Dresden Triptych , where Renfield outbid the achiever byabout a jillion dollars , account for ostentation . unluckily , Renfield thenimmediately abandons the Triptych inhis hotel room , where it is easily stolen by agents of Lord Davenport , whoopens the triptych to reveal … several painting of Dracula ’s married woman from the1400s , a.k.a . Jessica De Gouw , a.k.a The Huntress , a.k.a . Mina Murray . “ THATBITCH GONNA DIE ” Davenport shriek ( I may be paraphrasing ) , still reeling fromhis son ’s suicide .
When the hour of Mina ’s Dance of the Lunatics arrives , she’sshocked / delight to discover Grayson has replaced his phonogram with a fullorchestra , and even grabs an first inmate for the first dance . This is unearthly onabout 90 unlike degree , as Dracula and Mina dancing with a motley of smilingmadmen as if it ’s all the most normal , pleasant thing in the humans . Alas , Dracula ’s hunger is getting to him , and he has to leave the dance . Mina followshim , and , buoyed by Grayson ’s unselfishness and kindness , as well as the fact thatHarker did n’t wield to show up even after he call to , she grabs Graysonand begins the Victorian combining weight of dirty dancing ( it ’s essentially a walk-in , but with carousing expression on both dancers ’ faces ) . Dracula loves it untilthe hunger kick in again , and he starts fantasizing about turning Mina ’s neckinto a Big Gulp , but he barely manage to tear himself by from her and flees .
Which is probably for the honorable , because his big crazy freeelectricity event has already started , and I say I say “ already commence ” I mean“it ’s been shut out down by the constabulary for being a danger by get local peoplesick , even though the people are sick because the Order of the Dragon hired thelocal police force captain to poison a milkman ’s manner of speaking army tank which made everyonestart bazooka - barfing . ” The police force break open in and push everyone out before iteven start ; Dracula only arrivesas the crew is distribute , and is understandably disordered .
Oh , the intellect Harker did n’t make it to the Headbanger’sBall is because he was kidnapped by the Order of the Dragon , who want torecruit him , because even if Grayson is n’t Dracula , Grayson ’s crazy flower child freeelectricity concern need to be stopped . With all the other members In dark , Patrick from Coupling annunciate thatthe Order is in a holy war , and the Ottomans are sitting on the universe ’s largestpool of the 20th century ’s greatest resource , oil . Harker points out that ifthe Order is apprehensive about energy , is n’t Grayson ’s complimentary electricity material agood thing ? Patrick from Couplingmutters something about Grayson ’s tech being false , and Harker more or less hasno ground not to join up , especially after the Shaw incident .
The episode terminate with Grayson / Dracula going out of his wayto vote down the law skipper ’s gadget driver , grab his uniform , sit on his double-decker withhis coat perfectly set as to hide his face in tail , wait until the policecaptain get down in his carriage , and then rive the fashion plate out and drinks him . Hewanders back into his domicile , cover in rip . “ You ’re the monster , ” he hisses at Van Helsing , “ for giving me hopeI could be human . And one day I will vote out you for that . ” I ’m paraphrasingagain , but I ’m moderately near . And after what is true a middling broken - keyepisode for Dracula , it ’s pretty herculean stuff . Will Dracula really face offagainst Van Helsing in this ? Is Dracula even vicious ? How in god ’s name will thisinsanity end ? Tune in next week , same Dracula - time , some Dracula - epithelial duct .
Assorted Musings :
So I empathize Lady Jane mess up with Lucy when shethought Lucy was into Mina and Mina was into Harker and Harker was servingGrayson who might be a lamia . But after a vigorous fucking in the sun , LadyJane ’s suspicions have been fill ( cough ) . So what the hell is she doing byfucking with Lucy ? Other than being a shaft ?
Xaro Xhaon Renfield paying $ 1 million for the DresdenTryptich and this storing it behind his hotel dresser was easily the stupidestthing that has ever happened in Dracula .
To the best of my noesis , the Dresden Triptych does notcontain any pic of Jessica De Gouw in them .
I would have given much to read the thought balloon of theold tailor whom Lucy draw to sit down so she could measure Harker ’s inseam . He just looked so unconcerned . “ Yep , that lady sure want to nail a feel . Kidsthese day ! Whaddya gon na do ? ”
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